Da MalaGaitian

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Shits and giggles: Slow down pimp-sllooooowww down. Pimp gets da beeneez trying to save a hoe!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Chimps gone wild-AAAYYYYOOOOOO!!!!!

Over the weekend I came across a documentary on the Animal Planet entitled "Fatal Attractions" Chimp attacks. Now, before I continue I just want to let you all know that I personally had a small encounter with a chimp a few years ago. I mean, all he did was hug me but BOY OH BOY, all I can say is that their lil asses are HELLA STRONG! It was a close call with that one, whew....

Anyhoo, back to my original story. So, I was watching this doc and was taken back on how much strength a chimp has and the extent of damage that they can really do to someone. Folks, my boyfriend and I were literally speechless after seeing this footage I posted below.

***Don't let the faces fool ya: They can go from this

To this:

To this: lmao-NO LIE!

Here is footage from Animal Planet and another story about a young woman....

Go HARD or go to the hospital, that is the question? Beware of Extenze men......

A homegirl of mine gave me a call the other day explaining to me how her poor granddad tried Extenze and wasn't too pleased. Now I'm sure you folks had to have seen that hilarious commerical on tv with the middle aged guy talking about how it "changed" his life. Well, after my girl shared her story with me I decided to do some research of my own. Come to find out that her gramps wasn't the only one NOT impressed with this product. Here are some reviews from men who have had some bad experiences with it. Also, women who have witnessed their hubby's side effects. All I can say is DAYUM- NO BUENO!!!! Listen up men( especially middle aged, yikes), if your having technical difficulties getting Larry to salute...I suggest you take a safer approach. Ummmerraaa, like going to your DOCTOR prior to using an "as seen on tv" product for your winker! You may just end up with a stiff body in a coffin instead of a stiff d**k. Cue: Joey Lawrence voice "WHOA"…….

***REVIEWS:

DANGEROUS PRODUCT! My husband and I saw the infomercial and tried Extenze during a night of insomnia. The product did work, and I was not surprised, being familiar with the traditional uses of its ingredients. I have to say that my husband had no health problems before using the product. After 2-3 months, he began having heart palpitations, migraines, dizzy spells, insomnia, anxiety and mood swings. He stopped taking the product. Of course, it took three more months of constant phone tag to get them to cancel, and now we have a drawer full of the stuff. They would not take the product back or refund the money. On the rare occasion that he might take one just because there is over $120 going to waste in the drawer (six to eight months after discontinuing use) his symptoms start again. I truly believe this product is dangerous!!! DO NOT order it for any reason! There may be safer alternatives. We are very afraid that the short time he used Extenze may have had a permanent affect on his health. He is now taking medication every day for migraines that the doctor said would continue to get worse otherwise. He did not lose his life, thank God, but he may have lost his job as an equipment operator, or even caused someone else to become injured. Please don't be sucked in by this infomercial! Please don't risk your life on this product! If anyone else has medical problems, SPEAK UP!

I tried 3 pills and have since noticed consistent tingling, migraines, tightness in my chest. STAY AWAY!!!

I took this product for 3 months..I have experienced all the above systems, plus others...I had problems urinating, urinating frequently. Went to the doctor recently and found that my prostate was enlarged..im only 30 years old and according to the doctor that isnt right. He asked if i had possibly been taking hormones, but i have no ideal what is exactly in extenze or if it caused this or not, but it's a weird that it started happening shortly after starting it. I just didn't put two and two together until now.

HOLY SHIT GANG LISTEN TO THIS! 5 days into Extenze I took my shirt off and looked in the mirror in complete HORROR. My ENTIRE upper torso was covered with hives in front and back. I looked like something out of a horror movie as I had an obvious allergic reaction to it. Not only that, but I was becoming increasingly irritable and borderline vilolent after just the the 4th day. The morning wood three days in a row was nice as I felt like I was back in high school but clearly the gains did not out weigh the negatives in this instance. So goodbye morning wood and hello old me!

my husband is getting a metallic taste in his mouth after fifteen days of taking it and his left ear burns once in a while. We have called poison control and they said that it is a possibility that extenze poinsed him. I could only find zinc that might have done that. Did any one else experience this.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Fashion Battle wars Janet Jackson -vs- Madonna......

This is by far the toughest fashion battle war decision I've had to make, lol. These two women are literally commelians when it comes to fashion trends!!!! They are both HOT, ORIGINAL, GLAMOROUS, SPUNKY, SEXY and ECLECTIC risk takers when it comes to their looks! As I was going through the archives looking at different pics of Janet and Madonna, I said to myself "I wish I had to balls to wear half the stuff they do". I fell in love with every look I came across. Therefore, it was super hard for me to make a decision on this one. With that being said for the 1st time, it is (drum roll….) a TIE!!! HAHAHA-I simply can't choose between these ladies. I am a huge fan of both of them and their styles are just wicked!!! Kudos JJ and Madonna, this is the way a real bad bitch rocks it out!!!!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Random: When BIG ASS kids in carriages go WRONG.....

If I had a list of 5 things in the world that IRK me the most....#3 on that list would be seeing big ass kids in a carriage!!!!

Ok, this is a serious matter that has to be addressed NO, seriously. The other day as I was leaving work I was startled when I saw a child who looked like he was 10 being pushed in a carriage. YES, feet dangling, sneakers rubbing against the concrete, yelling and throwing a fit. I was beyond appalled and not only did I want to slap the hair off his head. I also wanted to slap his mama who said in a low voice "Jason please mommy wants you to stay calm". WWWHHHHHHHHHAAAATTTTT?!?!?!?! First off, your big ass should be WALKING JJJAAAASSSOOONNNN!!!! My thing is that once a child is a toddler and starts waddling around, guess what? YUP-walking time. The only time I would tolerate it is if my child is about 2 years old and maybe just maybe....I am running errands and need to strap him/her in while I multi-task. Word to the wise folks, if your child can walk there is no NEED for them to still be in a carriage at the age of 10-NO BUENO!!!